I went to the gym the other day and to my dismay, my headphones were not working.

“Whatever, I got myself this far–I’ll make the best of it.”

I go to my frienemy, the StairMaster, to begin contemplating my decision to go the gym for about 30 minutes.

Two bubbly, high pony-tail girls got on the StairMasters next to me. They began to talk and my nosy self couldn’t help but listen. I mean what’s a girl going to do when she can’t listen to her Taylor Swift Pandora?

Their conversation went something like this (note names have been changed).

“Oh my goodness so Amanda got so drunk she hooked up with Brad. And THEN she had the nerve to show up at church the next day. Haha nice try. You are not fooling anyone.”

Oh.

My bad.

Did I miss something where Jesus said, “hey before you enter my place of worship make sure you didn’t in your past hook up with Brad.” Must’ve missed that part.

The conversation got worse.

“Like Amanda is not fooling anyone with this wannabe Christian act. She’s def not a Christian. And to make it worse, she legit still had her Xs on at church. You could totally see them.”

HAH. Excuse me. I think I missed that part too. Maybe the 11th commandment was, “thou shalt not try to have a relationship with me if you have X’s on your hands from thy bar.”

Okay people, let’s get something straight — you are not better than the girl who hooked up with the boy drunk or the girl who threw up at the bar. You are not better than the girl who got an MIC or the boy who cheated on his girlfriend. You are not better. You are a sinner too.

To be honest, I’ve been both girls. The girl judged for her actions and the girl judging others. It stinks to be both girls. But I’ve also been the once messed up sinner running into Jesus’s arms after my sins.

And we all have to start somewhere.

Just because someone is lost doesn’t mean they will not get to their destination.

Trust me, I get lost going to the grocery store. But your gal always manages to get there and grab her Ben and Jerry’s.

We all are sinners who are in desperate need of a Savior. We all must confess our sins and then focus on answering God’s one question: will you follow me?

Yes, maybe my sins are different than “Amandas,” but they also aren’t different. They are just as dirty, stinky and have separated me from Christ. And when I was the girl judging, I was sinful. I was prideful. And I was just as dirty and stinky as Amanda, and as the girls on the StairMaster. They prohibited me from seeing how beautiful God’s grace was for a messed up frequent sinner like myself.

And you know what I learned? I may still mess up. I am not perfect. If I’m being honest, last week was a bad week for me where I struggled with sin– but my butt was in the church pew the following Sunday. Because I know I serve a God who sees my imperfections and doesn’t ask me what I did. He already knows what I did. He does not ask girls to wash their Xs off. He says come as you are. He says you are welcome to His table. He says confess your sins and then turn away from them and follow Him. He does not ask Amanda to pretend that she never even looked at Brad. He asks her to follow Him, learn from her mistake, and turn to Him.

We serve a loving God and forgiving God. One who challenges us to be better and asks us only what we’re going to do not what we have done.

So throw off the chains that you are burdening and look to the cross. A perfect man died for your sins. And no matter how bad you think your sins are or how “great” you think you are, you need Him. You need His love. You need His grace. And you need to answer His one question He is whispering into your heart: “will you follow me?”

And when you follow Him, you will love like Him. You will look at “Amanda” and welcome her — not belittle her. You will see beyond her Xs. And most importantly you will care for, support, and lift up your fellow sinner.

So as my good friend Jesus once said, “let the sinless man cast the first stone, and let judgement be left to God alone.”

Photocreds: https://www.instagram.com/jacobalves/ — JACOB ALVES

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Written by Grace Valentine

I love Jesus, diet coke and sunflowers. I wish I lived in the mountains, but love the two states I call home--Louisiana and Texas. I can watch Criminal Minds all day and dream of one day owning an ice cream truck for fun. However, my main goal in life is that more girls will realize the worth they have through Christ Jesus--and with Him and Him only we are enough.

107 comments

  1. Powerful message in this text! I agree with you, Grace. There are always those claimed Christians who are judging others, but need to look at themselves. They’re sinners, too. As Jesus said: “How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ while there is still a beam in your own eye? 5You hypocrite! First take the beam out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.” !!!!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. My pastor at church a couple of weeks ago preached on how Christians aren’t leading others to Christ because we lack mercy and compassion. We are too busy casting judgment that we aren’t loving as Christ loved. Good reminder again reading this article.

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  3. What about when Paul writes to the church at Corinth to not associate with anyone who claims to be a brother or sister who is sexually immoral or greedy, or an idolater or slanderer, a drunkard or swindler. The judging goes even further at the end of verse 11: “Do not even EAT with such people” (1 Cor 5:9-13). Paul goes on to say that if they are outsiders or nonbelievers why judge them? They do not know Christ, so how can we hold them to such a standard? But to those inside the church he unequivocally states: “expel the wicked person from among you!”

    The “do not judge sentiment” is pervasive in our culture, but the pendulum has gone too far when we see unrepentant sin in our Christian brothers and sisters and fail to call them out on it. Failing to address that is ultimately the most unloving thing to do.

    Liked by 4 people

    1. I totally agree addressing the sin is important. That is why I said you must confess and turn away from it in this article and then follow God. However, sitting on a StairMaster gossiping about some girls sin, is a sin. We need to pushing the “Amandas” to go to church, turn her eyes upon Jesus, see her sin and turn away. I hope that clears up your confusion

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Thanks for your reply, Grace. I have observed and even partaken in talking behind the backs of others–and I am also guilty of self-righteous pride. But I have recently seen many Christians tell me (in more words) that I cannot make moral judgments on other Christians or call out sin, because I am equally a sinner. “Judge not lest ye be judged” right? But there has to be a fine line between both grace and truth–because contrary to popular belief–sin matters!

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Grace,
        How would you personally have die this situation? If someone is in habitual, unrepentant sin. What would you say to Amanda if this was a daily Sunday occurence? Thanks! Great words!

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      3. I would first befriend her trust so my opinion matters to her and point her to scripture about being made new and being called to a new life. I also would help her by offering to see a movie on nights she was tempted to do other sinful activities 🙂 I hope this helped!

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    2. Paul was not Jesus. You need to remember that the way to salvation is Jesus Christ. Paul did not always get it right. He took falls short of the glory of God. Stay truth to what Jesus said…and you will always be on the right path.

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      1. I am not sure what this comment is trying to say. Surely not that Paul’s Holy Spirit inspired writing as recorded in Scripture is any less than the words of God?

        Liked by 2 people

      2. Susan, Dan’s point about the entire, inerrant, inspired word of God is well-made and well-taken. Jesus said that all Scripture is about Him (John5,Luke24), and it’s a gift of the Holy Spirit that we even know what sin is, and that we are sinners (John16). That said, I love Grace’s article because it has us consider sin, our response to sin in ourselves and others, and Christ’s instruction to teach repentance and forgiveness only to be found in Him. I agree that, to our shame and others’ peril, many Christians are either authoritarian or permissive, but it doesn’t remove our responsibility to tell each other the truth in love. Jesus said, “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another.” (John13.34)

        Because God has spoken through his Son, the Word made flesh, I’ll just leave what Jesus said at Luke17.1-5 for meditation: And he said to his disciples, “Temptations to sin are sure to come, but woe to the one through whom they come! 2 It would be better for him if a millstone were hung around his neck and he were cast into the sea than that he should cause one of these little ones to sin. 3 Pay attention to yourselves! If your brother sins, rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him, 4 and if he sins against you seven times in the day, and turns to you seven times, saying, ‘I repent,’ you must forgive him.”5 The apostles said to the Lord, “Increase our faith!”

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      3. Paul was not Jesus. But, the words of Paul in the Bible are just as important and just as inspired as Jesus’s. The Bible is equally inspired and we are to take every part of it as absolutely inerrant and true.

        Liked by 2 people

    3. I agree with you Dan, to an extent. We are often afraid to confront sin among those who are believers. But I also know that God did not call us to point out others’ sins so that we can feel better about our own. We are called to be a light. But there is a world of difference between coming alongside someone and offering your flashlight and walking up to someone while shining it directly in their eyes. One is helpful to that person, and the other may cause far more harm than good. It is not our job to convict people. It is not our job to go to our fellow Christians and ask why they don’t feel bad about the sin we see in them. It is our job to state truth, and offer love. You want to crack a hard heart, ask that person if they’re ok. You can call someone out loudly and publicly, shaming them and causing a deep wound (which is not how love works). Or you can step along side someone and ask how they are, because you genuinely care, and gently guide the conversation to the sin that needs to be brought to light, that it can be confessed and forgiven. It requires a deep and abiding love for a person to be willing to come alongside them to address sin. It requires seeing them through Jesus’ eyes, and not our own.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Yes, finally the same thoughts I had. So many christians donthe unchristian act of calling someone out to deflect their own as if some people didn’t already know or feel bad about their wrong doings. Well said 😍

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    4. Tom,
      In this passage, Paul lowered the boom on the Corinth church, because there was a man that was prideful about the affair he was having with his Fathers wife. The church also glorified in this and became prideful of the man’s sin and not mournful of the mans behavior and Paul gave them instruction to cast the man out of the church for his blatant pride in committing and severely & correctly rebuked the church for also letting the man come in and being arrogant with him and tolerating his SIN.

      In proper context, we then gain revelation knowledge that I Cor 5 has nothing to do with casting out someone from the church that is working out their own salvation with fear and trembling like “Amanda”….nor is it a mandate to go “sin” hunting, that is not your Job, that is the Holy Spirit’s job.

      If you rightly divide the Corinthians epistles, we notice that Paul’s second instruction regarding this man comes in 2 Corinthians 2. The church had went completely overboard in their treatment of this man and Paul urged them to stop, forgive, love and restore him, because the punishment they placed on the man was too much and if they continued he would become overcome with excessive annoyance, bitterness and sorrow….and would fall from the faith, and this treatment is a scheme of Satan, we should not be ignorant of…..

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  4. Your articles are among my favorites. You wisdom and knowledge of Jesus amazes me. Thank you for being a light in this world! ❤

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  5. You are definitely right that we should be careful about judging others and about gossip. Love and grace should be defining characteristics of Christians first and foremost.
    I just want to be sure you aren’t condoning sin. Grace absolutely covers all sin, but we must be careful not to abuse grace (Romans 6:1-2). Afterall Jesus the next words Jesus said after saying “he who is without sin cast the first stone” we’re “go and sin no more” to the woman caught in adultery.

    By no means do I want to sound legalistic. I just want to convey the seriousness of sin (Jesus DIED for it). We should be moved enough by that act of love to not continue in the very sin that put him on the cross. We will never be perfect, but should strive towards holiness daily.

    Your anger and sadness when you heard the gossip from the girls was definitely a valid response though. The correct response from them would be to sit down with the “party” girl in question and address the situation (not spread gossip). Jesus says in Mattew 18 to go to a fellow believer who is in sin and talk to them directly about it. If they don’t listen bring another believer along. The ultimate goal of this being redemption and a healed relationship with God.

    Just wanted to touch on that. You may very well agree with that, and it may have simply been your intention to highlight grace.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Hi Josh YES I agree. Sin is awful and horrible. We NEED our Savior daily. I talk about turning away from sin and answering God’s question of “will you follow me”. Once Jesus in the passage saved the adulterous woman from being stoned He asked her to turn away from her sinful life. He did the same thing again later. God gives us forgiveness and then we follow Him doing our best to look to Him daily.

      The point of this article is to highlight those millenial Christians who act like the pharisees. Quick to judge others, before looking in the mirror. Also to show that loving like Jesus is “welcoming Amandas” not belittling her.

      I am all about telling those in sin that they are in sin like in Matthew 18, however I am not for acting more worthy than others and gossiping.

      Does that make sense?

      Liked by 1 person

    2. Josh,
      I believe Matthew 18.15 says that you go to a brother/sister who has committed a sin or trespass against you personally, not someone that is living in SIN. If Amanda lied about you, you would be correct in going to her alone and pointing out her sin towards you. If she denies the issue, you then take one or more with you, who witnessed her lying about you with you and confront her again….if that fails you and the witness take it before the church[Pastoral care] Matthew 18.15-18 does not apply to confronting an Amanda that went clubbing and sexing the night before….

      If you confront Amanda based on hearsay from someone else, or following hunch and not the Spirit seeing what looks like stamps on her hands from the bar, then you are no better than she is….

      The best practice is to allow the Holy Spirit to convince Amanda that her behavior the night before is not how a daughter of God would act. As she comes to the altar to get right with God, a well trained female altar counselor should be led by the same Holy Spirit to pray with Amanda. Usually at this point, believer Amanda has probably already asked God for forgiveness of her SIN. The Altar worker should comfort her and begin restoration, not pointing out she missed the mark…

      The Altar worker should be led by the Spirit to discern whether or not unbeliever Amanda expressed worldly sorrow that leads to death or a Godly sorrow that produces a repentance without regret that leads to salvation.

      After this, either Amanda would then need to be put into a proper discipleship small group, that would show her through God’s word how enabling grace will instruct her to deny ungodliness and worldly desires and to live sensibly, righteously and godly everyday.

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  6. Great article to read, I wish there could have been verses cited in the article so people know it’s coming from God’s word and they can search for themselves. Thank you for the story, grace and peace to you.

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  7. One of my friends just shared this and for some reason I clicked on it (I don’t read a lot of stuff shared through social media). To my surprise, I loved it. And I won’t openly admit that it almost brought me to tears (…oops). We all need this reminder, daily. And I love the way you gently reminded us that we all need Christ’s grace.

    So after reading this (and loving it) I decided I wanted to know more about the author. It said you go to Baylor and I just couldn’t help myself. I was also a journalism student at Baylor – Class of 2012! Just wanted to pop in and say “Sic ‘Em” and keep up the great work! It makes me so proud when I see people like you making my school pride shine brighter (and that’s a big deal because it’s already pretty bright)!

    For the first time in my life, I subscribed to a blog…and I can’t wait!

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    1. Savannah if you ever are in Waco again please say hi!! I love meeting former journalism students!! I am so glad you enjoyed it and felt moved by God,that is encouraging for me. I am glad to be the first blog you subscribed too ahahah! Made me giggle! God bless new friend!

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  8. I think the message of this is great, and I definitely agree that we shouldn’t be talking about anyone like this. However, I think that when Amanda hooks up with brad every weekend, then comes to church and continues to live both lifestyles, that is not turning from sin. That is not repenting. We have to have grace for others because we always need it, but there does come a time when someone needs to be called out for trying to live for themselves and God.

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    1. I agree with that Chloe, which is why at the end I talk about the importance to help Amanda see her sin and turn away from it. I am not condoning sin. I am simply against judging others, gossip and thinking you are more “worthy” than another

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  9. Amen! So true about judgement and gossip since both are sin…and as such not any better or worse sins than sexual sin. The only thing “worse” about sexual sin is that it is “against your own body” (see 1 Corinthians 6:18). But Jesus died the same way for every sin we commit. And He says in the gospel that those who believe they are more righteous than others will not come out well in the end (Luke 18:9-14…the Pharisee and the tax collector…those who exalt themselves shall be humbled and those who humble themselves will be exalted). Without condoning the sin we are to restore such a brother or sister with a “gentle spirit, looking to yourself also that you may not also be tempted” (see Galatians 6:1). Thank you for sharing with us this truth of God’s will for us through His Word. 🙏🏻☺️

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  10. Great article. I greatly appreciate your stance on equal ground among us all. I did want to say that there are no New Covenant scriptures that say Christians are sinners. Paul and the others call us saints. We are defined by our relationship with Christ, not our former identity as a sinner.

    Be blessed and keep pushing the Kingdom!

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  11. This is the greatest thing I have ever read. It really reminded me that no matter what I have done, God is always there. I can’t tell you the amount of times I have sinned on saturday and been to ashamed to go to church on Sunday or pick up my bible for 5+ days after. You just changed everything for me.

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  12. As someone who used to get too drunk almost every Saturday during my college years, I always held true to the fact that God loves you and wants you to be there regardless of your sins the night before.

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  13. Thanks for the post. Never have wrote a comment, although I have read LOTS of blogs. This is so incredibly true, and I think so many people could benefit from this message (including me).

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  14. I love this! This is something that hurts me to see. I’ve had friends tell me they feel judged and excluded from the church, but they should feel loved and know that God will not only accept them, but welcome them with open arms. Instead of judging each other for our sins, we should be supporting each other in our relationship with God. Well written article, thank you for sharing!

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  15. Thank you for your courage to write truth about sin and forgiveness. The first group listed for the lake of fire in Revelation is “cowards”. Never be a coward when the Holy Spirit has prompted your voice, it may be the only Jesus someone else hears.

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  16. Here’s the question that was unanswered… did Amanda recognize her behavior as sin? Or is that just par for the course for her? I’m aware of many “Christians” who sleep around and don’t think twice about it – the idea of celibacy in singleness is a foreign concept.

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    1. I agree it is bad to stay and sin and we must turn away and be made new. We must never take advantage of grace. Sadly only Jesus knows this young lady’s heart so it will remain an unanswered question unless our paths cross

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  17. This is the most real thing I’ve read in a while. And my question is how did these ”mean girls’ know that she had hooked up with brad and gotten drunk had they not been there themselves. You cannot act ‘holier than thou’ when you yourself are taking part (the girls)
    If they were true, Godly women, they would seek their friend out and talk with her and remind her that Jesus is the only way to find relief.
    God has been presented as a taker (stealing this from a message I heard a while back) when in reality, all He wants is to give you a life with Him in it. I have been judged and I have been the one casting judgment and in both seats, it is uncomfortable.
    We as Christians should be more Christ like and tactful in how we handle these sinners lest we push them further from the truth. They are fragile and scared. They should be approached easily and gently reminded that what they are doing, is the very reason why Christ died. Something that should not be taken lightly.
    I cannot imagine a world where Jesus was screaming at sinners just because they sinned. He didn’t have to scream to get his point across, afterall, He still speaks in a still small voice.
    I loved this article and agree whole heartedly with you about both the ‘amandas’ of the world and the ”mean girls’ of the world. You done a wonderful job at writing this. My comment was directed at others who spoke so harshly of calling out these sinners. Jesus was a peaceful man while He was here and has not changed I’m sure since He has returned to Heaven. He would not want us to call these sinners out in a harsh way. A gentle way. A calm way. Like Him. As He did for so many whom He encountered through His life on earth.
    I’ll step down off my box now lol great article. It made me think much deeper than I have in a long time. Thank you.

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      1. I’m so happy that what I wrote made sense to you. It’s through God I found the words. So glad to call you a friend! May God bless you in spreading His word, His light, and His love through your blogs 💜

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      1. Grace, hello. Great article on a difficult subject. I came to it because it came to me from my granddaughter’s post. I was so pleased to see her relaying this. I would like to add some comments. Maybe a future revisit to topic. Irma Zaleski wrote in “The Way of Repentance” …”The call to repentance is fundamental to the whole Christian Tradition.”. Then she refers to the Old and New Testament writings and the early Father’s of the Church, Councils, the saints and countless thousands of faithful who …”tried to live out this call.” Then she queries how Western contemporary Christians seem unwilling or unable to respond to this call. She suggests there is confusion on two components of repentance. First, a misinterpretation of the effect of owning our sin. Seeing it as a negative emotion or even an exaggerated neurotic psychological guilt trip rather than a pathway to love and freedom that will bring us to deep trust in our merciful God. Second, Zaleski addresses the nature of our salvation. She believes people often do not know the “immensity of what we have lost through sin.”. Adding, we can not “mourn the absence of what we do not know we could have. “. Following those words she writes, “…We do not understand the true nature of sin.”. Continuing she says “We tend to think of it (sin) asdisobedience, the breaking of …Commandment, individual wrong acts, rather than as a painful condition of the human spirit. Thus we….View repentance as a way of paying a debt, a spiritual transaction, and not…..As a way of healing and life.”. Reading her words sharpened my own thoughts about how I identify with the whole interior self examination of my brokenness, the call and process of repentance and the wonder of a healed life brought about in the immensity of God’s merciful act of salvation as a body, mind and spirit healing. Recognizing sin, not just as a guilt, but more completely as a separation from unity with fellow Christians, which is itself ,spiritual illness, brings me to a deeper desire to be healed and a fuller realization of the nature of evil which is sin. Thank you for the time needed to read this. Keep sending out you message. May God bless your work.

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  18. This is an amazing writing and such wonderful refreshing discussion without ugliness. This article really hit home, not only to me, but to a friend that I was talking about this very subject. Thank you so much! God Bless you.

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  19. I think you make wonderful points about love, mercy, and grace. And I think the comments absolutely nailed it with Jesus’ emphasis on “go and sin no more.”

    I would have loved to hear if you brought these heartfelt words to the girls’ attention. Because while talking about them here is highlighting grace it does seem also a little like talking behind their back just like they were talking behind “Amanda’s” back. 🙂

    Sounds like they need some grace and love education too. 🙂

    That said, I can tell you are super passionate about the topic and appreciate your perspective.

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    1. Although I didn’t say anything initially, because I did not know them and didn’t have the chance to befriend them, although I should have befriended them and I know it because Jesus invites all sinners to His tables. I also saw myself in those girls because I’ve been there too and this article was out of love! I saw myself judging others when I heard them and knew this had been my problem. Sometimes it is easier to see your struggle on someone else. thank you for your wisdom and comment God bless!

      Liked by 1 person

  20. This collision of accountability and grace is right at the core of our faith, and one of our hardest balancing acts. We cannot tolerate sin. But pretending our performance justifies us before God more than another person…is just as sinful. A slap in the face of grace.

    Even if we discipline, we must do so only out of sad necessity, drenched in an understanding of our own need for grace.

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  21. Yes!! This makes me think of the Casting Crowns song, “Does Anybody Hear Her”.
    I’ve been both sides of this conversation. I’ve been the girl out partying, getting drunk, and sleeping around. I’ve been the one to gossip, have unrighteous anger, and I’ve been the one whose had to walk away from people, because although I care about them, I can’t stay watching the sin, especially when they say that the Bible is just written by men, and not Holy Inspired. (Just had that conversation tonight, so instead of saying something out of anger, I just unfriended and will pray that someone better than I, will help lead her to the truth, I just know that it’s not me, not tonight).
    What I know is that I am a sinner, I gossip, I deal with unrighteous anger, I fight gluttony, coveting, not submitting to my husband, and I know that I judge those who do all the same sins. I am so grateful that God shows me my sins, I’m grateful for when a friend reminds me of the plank in my eye, and gently helps me pull it out (and sometimes they just yank that baby out!).

    This is my first time reading your blog, I look forward to exploring it more and seeing what else the Lord uses through you to touch my heart, convict me, and guide me.

    God bless

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  22. BTW I love this.. I too have been both people in this article !
    I’m thankful for Amanda going to her Redeemer after committing her sin … during my time of being her myself tho I did not run to My Mercy Seat …I let condemnation keep me imprisoned for a long season because of Brotherly:Sisterly talk (the church) and my very own condemnation…I felt that I had failed God in such a way I could not return so I continued in my sin….. my heart is forever thankful to the few that kept saying to me Rise Up! Proverbs 24:16 For a righteous man may fall seven times …And Rise Again.. that does not mean we have the right to abuse Grace.. when there is true repentance that is not a factor..Gods Love and forgiveness was demonstrated through a couple of people to help me Rise Up and find Him again…and that my friend is not condoning sin that is demonstrating Active Love that heals and delivers and sets captives free! Let’s join together and be conduits of Gods Welcoming Love! Matt 11:28 Come to Me!
    I pray every ear that is weary and heavy burdened will become deaf to the na sayers and be opened to hear our Redeemer say Come!
    In His Workmanship,
    Kim Tomberlin

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  23. I too, have been on both sides, especially in my twenties, so I can’t & won’t pass judgment. I have also had comments said to me almost identical to this about others & feel the blood rush to my face wanting to respond but just remain silent or just say oh really, she did? Just so I wouldn’t be the out spoken one or be in the middle of conflict & I know this is wrong. It is my prayer that we all can speak up in love & say the right things so we don’t join in on the gossip or judgment, yet at the same time it be well received & not sound like we are judging the ones that are judging, gossiping or talking about someone else. Thank you for sharing this.

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  24. It’s so easy to fall into the worldly trap of getting caught up in judging others. I still have moments where it may pop up, but I don’t mean to. It’s our human nature, but like you said we serve a forgiving Savior. This blog was on my Facebook and I decided to check it out, and I am so happy I did. It’s an awesome heart and mind change when we see broken people, such as ourselves, and love on them. No judgement at all, just there for support. God is a life changer. God is a miracle worker. So many struggles I still face today are not as strong as they used to be. All glory to God. I will definitely be following up and reading more blogs from you. Keep writing whatever the Lord places on your heart. We, as women, need to know our importance found in the Lord. Find our confidence in Him alone before we can be there for others. I’m still learning so much about myself, and I know I always will. Thankful that I can turn to God as I am. I don’t have to edit things or make changes before doing so. He loves me as I am! God Bless.

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  25. If you just go out and do the same thing over and over next week, though, don’t pretend you’re being a Christian, and don’t pretend it’s okay just because I am a human who pointed that out and therefore am not qualified to judge. It’s still not right and God would say the same; if you believe in what’s written, then read it and you’ll find the answers there.

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    1. I’m not saying it is not a sin, and not living a lie, I just know that Jesus brought the tax collectors to eat with Him. He sat with the sinners and then pointed them to the truth. He didn’t criticize them he befriended them and then told them the way of the truth by example

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  26. Amazing post! It is a good reminder that us women are too hard on one another! Not just one another, we are also so hard on ourselves. I hate that our society tears down other women, why? We need to be lifting one another up and celebrating them. If I am being honest, I’ve definitely been both of those girls. But I have learned to love myself first, which in return has stopped my judgement towards other women.

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  27. Grace,
    Wonderfully written and total truth from the Word….Only Truth sets the captive free, continue pressing towards the mark of your high calling in Christ Jesus!

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      1. our job is to love. the holy spirit will convict and God will judge. have a hard time doing my job. not qualified for the other two jobs

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  28. All positive posts. I wonder why? I guess it’s easy when you won’t post a differing opinion. Are Christians the only ones that have the right answer to everything?

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  29. The number one bad thing here is the drinking. Some guys purposely use alcohol to lower the gal’s resistance and judgement. Wouldn’t it be fantastic if the girls had a buddy system and watched out for each other? Chances are really good that “Amanda” really didn’t want the sexual part of the deal. Buddies can help protect each other.
    The fact that Amanda is in church the next Sunday is a really, really good sign. It could mean that she WANTS to live a good and holy life, but when she drinks, her good intentions and holy resolutions just go out the window. She needs the other girls badly, to help her 1. NOT get drunk. 2. If she still does over-drink to get a ride home. 3. Not let her go off with some boy who is totally taking advantage of the fact that she is drunk. The last thing she needs is a judge and jury. I would suspect she already has judged herself harshly… And the other girls only cement that judgement.
    Come on, we friends have to stick together and HELP each other!

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  30. I love how honest this is. Grace through faith! It breaks my heart when I see other Christians bashing someone because of their struggle. If they have true faith in Jesus then they are saved and their heart is being changed. Some strongholds just take a lot of time to break but the work that was started in our hearts will be finished. I hope someone can give Amanda some encouragement

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