One time I woke up and half my face was paralyzed. And it was picture day…
Okay I’m exaggerating… it was only club picture day. But still picture day none the less. Oh and yes half my face was paralyzed. That part was 100% true.
So when I smiled… only the left side of my face would go up and smile as normal. My right side sat still and frozen on my face. When I raised my eyebrows, only half my forehead would wrinkle and only one eyebrow would go up. The other brow just sat there. And when I blinked, only one eye would blink; the other eye would struggle. At night I wore an eye patch… and during the day I tried to remember to blink and had to use my hands to physically blink my right eye.
What was God doing that day idk… I can just picture Him having a good ole’ belly-laugh in heaven “wait till she sees what I’ll teach her”. But when 12-year-old Grace found out she had this random disease that is usually common in the elderly and not pre-teen, puberty stricken, awkward young girls–she panicked.
I didn’t just have this disease for a day…I had it for about a month. And when the little girl who considered Aeropostle her go-to, secretly still played with her webkinz, and had eye glasses bought from the same store you can buy mayonnaise found out she would have this not cute disease for a long period of time; she began to question what her worth was… if she even had any.
So I did what any 12-year-old / any age woman would do… I cried.
I stared at myself in the mirror for too long. I hated who I was and I felt like I wasn’t worthy. I felt like I would never get a boyfriend. I began being worried only one boob would grow and the other would just stay the same. I was so sure I’d need to find a half training bra, half average bra size bra to wear when I was 16. I began to think I wasn’t worthy of love, a real bra or happiness.
Sadly, as I grew up I still questioned my worth. I didn’t need this random disease to make me insecure. All I needed was a mirror, a mean boy and my emotions to make me feel unworthy.
Lies. You don’t need this disease to question your worth. In fact, I have a feeling the girl reading this has at least once looked in the mirror and questioned her worth.
To every girl–whether your full face is working or only half, you are worthy. Whether you have Walmart glasses or Ray Bans…Whether you have an amazing boyfriend, one who makes you insecure, or whether you’ve never had a boyfriend–you are worthy.
See the biggest mistake every woman makes is when she questions her worth.
LET’S STOP DOING THAT ASAP LADIES!!!
Our society says we as women aren’t worthy of love unless we earn it. We aren’t worthy of love unless we “deliver” and “please the man”. We are told fairy-tales are only for girls who look like a princess. We are told that life is only fun if you are pretty and get tons of likes on social media.
You are worthy of joy, love and life–but this is not because of anything you have done. You are worthy because you aren’t worthy. You are worthy because one dreary day a perfect man was stabbed to a tree as a sacrifice for your messy heart. Because of that you have worth, a purpose, and the ability to live with the spirit inside you. This spirit is more pleasing that the cute boy you are chasing or hitting 200 likes on an Instagram.
Man ladies, Jesus Christ is beautiful and He thinks you are too. He thinks you are worthy, even though your ex-boyfriend thought that other girl was prettier for 20 minutes of your relationship. He thinks you are worthy, even though those mean girls talk about you behind your back. He thinks you are worthy even after seeing your biggest regret, your biggest failure, and your tendency to wait till the night before to do your assignment.
Fall in love with your first love and you will realize your worth has nothing to do with you. Once you realize that you don’t have to be “flawless” for this worth you have freedom and the spirit inside your heart. This spirit delivers more joy than the boy texting you back.
You were created by the One who hung the stars and painted the sea. And He says “hey hun’ I created YOU in the image of me…”
And He loves YOU more that all those combined. He looks down on you and says “yeah..that one…she’s mine.” So wake up tomorrow and look in the mirror and say “I am worthy. And this is not because of some boy, or how well I contour. This gift comes from God.”
Look in the mirror and realize that although that girl in the mirror may have pimples, cellulite, and a messy heart–she is loved. She is loved by someone more beautiful than the boy who only asks you for a pen and never asks you for your number. She is loved by someone more important that the girl who sits at the “cool” lunch table and snickers as she walks by. She is loved. And this has nothing to do with how she looks today or if half her face is paralyzed. It is a gift. A gift you cannot exchange because it costs too much. A gift that lasts for eternity.
Whether you are 73, 36, 23, 19 or 14–I have one prayer for you.
God may the girl reading this see her worth comes from you. May she stop worrying about her relationships from the world and fall back in love with you her first love–in a new and adventures way. May she dance with you and follow your lead. And may she see her beauty, potential, and purpose in this crazy world while she takes your hand, follows your lead, and begins to glide where she is called. May she stop comparing herself to others and simple gaze in your eyes, following your lead with grace. May she realize her worth comes from you and not herself–and find the freedom to that. Amen.
Peace be with you, and joy be inside you. May you look at mirror and realize you are enough through Christ. Share with a friend who may need this reminder.
“And God raised us up with Christ and seated us with him in the heavenly realms in Christ Jesus, in order that in the coming ages he might show the incomparable riches of his grace, expressed in his kindness to us in Christ Jesus. for it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God—not by works, so that no one can boast.”–Ephesians 2:6-9 L
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